Member-only story
Here’s Why We Should Start Responding Instead Of Reacting
I was just searching on how we should learn to react, react to our worries, troubles and challenges when I came across an article that talks about how we should be learning to respond instead of reacting. I wondered, just like most of you do, and continued reading…
I realised the importance of responding to critical challenges that could have been done to make a difference. I realised the importance of the millisecond that could make a difference between responding and reacting and I realised the importance of self control and mindfulness in situations that we face every day, every moment.
‘Do you have the patience to wait
till your mud settles and the water is clear?’
~Lao Tzu
What Is Reacting
I thought it might be good starting out first explaining what I learnt about reacting and responding respectively.
Reacting for instance is often classified as the normal human reaction that we have. That normal mode that we are often set for, without a second thought. We often react base on insecurities or fear that may trigger a sense of uncertainties or unease. Reacting often do not come with any pause or the practice of mindfulness. We just react as it is without a second thought.
I like to see reacting as acting mindlessly base on the default preset “human instinct” and is controlled by the unconscious mind.
One of the article I came across gave an example of reacting as being furious, angry and start yelling at your child when your child breaks something. In this example, it is our human instinct to feel anger, and insecurity or unease. It is absolutely normal to feel the urge to yell and give your child a good scolding. That’s our default, the unconscious mind at work. But we fail to realise that by reacting that way, we are not helping our child any further, and the relationship between the child and you will not be improved, but instead worsened.
What Is Responding
Responding on the other hand takes more work, more effort. Because responding is when our conscious mind take over control, our conscious mind work its way out of the “default” mode that we are set with. While we respond to a challenge…
